How Long Should I Wait?

#1
Me : How long should I wait?
Friend : Why? You are lost because of Apple's new map?
Me : No, but I think the iPhone itself is lost and doesn't know the way to my apartment
Friend : Errr...

#2
Me : How long should I wait?
Friend ♀ : *whistling* Waiting for a new girlfriend?
Me : Yeah...
Friend ♀ : You've received your karma. I used to wait for you and now you have to wait for another. Ha ha ha
Me : You're right. My karma is working
Friend ♀: So, can she speak Indonesian?
Me : Yes, I think. She is from the U.S.
Friend ♀: Wow. Do I know her?
Me : Yes, her name is SIRI
Friend ♀: Errr...

Don't Mention That

Me : So, how is it going with the plan?
Friend : What plan?
Me : You said you were going out with that girl
Friend : Stttt... Don't mention that, my girlfriend is next to me. She sometimes takes a peek on my phone
Me : Errr...

Yoghurt?

Me : There is something wrong with the milk
Friend : Why? What happened?
Me : I think it is stale. I need to throw it away
Friend : Why throw it away? Stale milk turns into yoghurt, you know.
Me : Errr...

They Weren't Mad?

Friend : So, you studied psychology, right?
Me : Yeah. It was - and still is - fun
Friend : Your parents let you study that major? They weren't mad?
Me : Yes, why?
Friend : You know, parents in Medan would usually be mad if the son doesn't study business or something that will give you much money
Me : Errr... 

Birl

Friend : Did you just see that?
Me : See what? 
Friend : The couple who just walked by
Me : Yeah, are they boys or girls? Too difficult to distinguish
Friend : They are BIRLS
Me : What is that?
Friend : Boy girls, girls who look like boys
Me : Errr...

Don't Tell Anyone

Me : So, that's the thing. Please don't tell anyone.
Friend : Okay. I won't. I promise.
Me : Thank you very much.
Friend : Well, even if I do, I will tell them not to tell anybody.
Me : Errr...

Surviving Jakarta 101

Friend : Remember to put your wallet and phone in your front pocket when you take a bus here.
American Friend : Yes.
Friend : Put your backpack in front. Jakarta is not safe.
American Friend : Yes.
Me : Well, he already got the tips from us.
Friend : Really? You got your Surviving Jakarta 101 from them?
Me : Errr....